too bad blogs dont answer my questions

ive been tamed for the past 2 weeks. I made a biiiig mistake my first night out here so the past 2 weeks have been about me getting my act together. but tomorrow i get to go out again. :) not to say im going to be crazy again but im just so excited to be back in MY element. nighttime fun:) thats where i strive. smiling and dancing and laughing. im going out to shoreditch with a couple of my girlfriends. ive been thinking about it all week. also, wtf, why is he messaging me? why is he all of a sudden trying to keep in contact with me when all hes been trying to do the past couple months is push me away for this new girl. idk. ive always been aa firm believer in me and him being together. we worked. we didnt work, lol, but we worked. ill always hold a place for him in my heart and life, i believe. but how long do i wait for something that could possibly never happen. i told him i wouldnt message him anymore, but should that apply when he messages me first?